Funny Quotes of Wit and Wisdom

These funny quotes also shed light on more than a little bit of the truth in the form of witty wisdom. Famous writers  and philosophers often express lifes irony wrapped up as comedy and humor helps to drive the point home. Wit and Wisdom Quotes If you read a lot of books, youre considered well-read. But if you watch a lot of TV, youre not considered well-viewed. -Lily TomlinAdvice is what we ask for when we already know the answer but wish we didnt. -Erica JongBefore you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way when you criticize them, you are a mile away from them and you have their shoes. -Jack HandeyI know that there are people who do not love their fellow man, and I hate people like that! -Tom LehrerClothes make the man. Naked people have little or no influence on society. -Mark TwainA synonym is a word you use when you cant spell the word you first thought of. -Burt BacharachA signature always reveals a mans character—and sometimes even his name. -Evan EsarIf you cannot answer a mans argument, all it not lost; you can still call him vile names. -Elbert HubbardHe who believes that the past cannot be changed has not yet written his memoirs. -Torvald GahlinI guess a drag queen’s lik e an oil painting: You gotta stand back from it to get the full effect. -Harvey FiersteinJealousy is all the fun you think they had. -Erica JongIf were not supposed to eat animals, how come theyre made out of meat? -Tom SnyderIf you dont know where you are going, you will wind up somewhere else! -Yogi BerraInstead of holding on to the Biblical view that we are made in the image of God, we come to realize that we are made in the image of the monkey. -Lin YutangIn spite of the cost of living, its still popular. -Kathleen NorrisI think of myself as an intelligent, sensitive human being with the soul of a clown, which always forces me to blow it at the most important moments. -Jim MorrisonPeople are too durable, thats their main trouble. They can do too much to themselves, they last too long. -Bertolt BrechtDon’t look back, something might be gaining on you. -Satchel PaigeIn my day, we couldn’t afford shoes, so we went barefoot. In the winter we had to wrap our feet with b arbed wire for traction. -Bill Flavinï » ¿If the English language made any sense, lackadaisical would have something to do with a shortage of flowers. -Doug Larson

A Brief Note On The Outbreak Of Ebola - 2197 Words

Rise Above Ebola Vanessa Aroonprapun Eric Cabus Darnell Ferrer Kristina Santos Somatey Tan American University of Health Sciences Rise Above Ebola The latest outbreak of Ebola is one of the largest epidemics in history. Starting in West Africa, it has spread to neighboring countries such as Guinea, Liberia and Sierra Leone, causing numerous fatalities (Darrel, 2014). The Center for Disease Control (CDC) has identified five different strains of the Ebola virus—Zaire, Sudan, Reston, Bundibugyo and Tai—with Zaire and Sudan cited as being the most harmful strains with 68% and 53% average death rate respectively (Darell, 2014). The first strain of Ebola was discovered in 1976, in the Dominican Republic of Congo, and was contained until the recent mutations of different strains (Felscher, 2013). There is evidence that experimental drug, ZMapp, has helped treat Ebola infected individuals (Parshley,2014). Although ZMapp can be an expensive drug to produce, Ebola patients should be allowed to get access to this because it can help control their prognosis and mortality rate. Why is Ebola a Concern? Ebola is a global concern primarily because the disease is deadly, and scientists and researchers have very minimal information about the newer strains of Ebola. Due to the very little data, countries are less willing to send their top researchers to Ebola-stricken countries to conduct researches (Hewlett, 2007). According to the World Health Organization (WHO), there hasShow MoreRelatedThe Epidemic Of Ebola Virus1206 Words   |  5 Pagesfear of the dark, the panic caused by the Ebola virus is largely due to misunderstanding and is often blown out of proportion. The Ebola virus is discussed in the media because it generates hysteria, even though it is nowhere near as threatening as it is often claimed to be. Do not make the assumption that the virus itself is not lethal, as indeed it is one of the deadlier pathogens in the world; however, a variety of factors contribute to making the Ebola virus a less than perfect killer; in orderRead MoreThe Hot Zone9599 Words   |  39 Pagest he fate that awaits anyone else who becomes infected. It is quite clear from the narrative that Charles Monet is the first, but certainly not the last, human who will encounter a terrible virus during the course of this story. The origins of the outbreak are foreshadowed as Monet handles a dying bird, feeds a wild monkey, and encounters bat guano and crystals in the cave. The Hot Zone Summary | Part 1, Chapter 2 Jumper Summary In this short chapter, Charles Monet is placed on a gurney and wheeledRead MoreEssay on Fall of Asclepius95354 Words   |  382 Pages. You say that word to anyone before the outbreak and what would they think of? They would, think of those horror movies or comic books where, for no reason what so ever, zombies appear all around the globe in an instance. Thats not how it happened for us. There were signs for over two months. Its just that no one took the time to put the pieces together. I kind of did. I knew there was something more than what we were told about the riots and outbreaks, but I never even thought of the possibilityRead MoreInternational Management67196 Words   |  269 Pagestext were created exclusively for this edition and provide opportunities for reading and analysis outside of class. Review questions provided for each case are intended to facilitate lively and productive written analysis or in-class discussion. Our â€Å"Brief Integrative Cases† typically explore a specific situation or challenge facing an individual or team. Our longer and more detailed â€Å"In-Depth Integrative Cases† provide a broader discussion of the challenges facing a company. These two formats allow

Character breakdown Free Essays

Set at a fictional university, all the characters reside in a fraternity sponsored house within the confines of university grounds. All the characters are an attempt to break stereotypes, and come from regularly viewed backgrounds found in American society. Marcus Pullman Senior, African-American middle-class from New York. We will write a custom essay sample on Character breakdown or any similar topic only for you Order Now Marcus Pullman is not a star athlete, or the campus drug dealer. He is as about as average as they come, with a good GPA, an interest in football and baseball, but an even stronger interest in environmental issues and obtaining a degree in political science. He is one of many American families from the middle-income band, with a father who is a NY firefighter and a mother who works as a legal assistant at a law firm. Marcus is part of a small statistic, an alarming statistic of overall African-American males in universities in America. According to an article in 2004, â€Å"today, black men make up 41 percent of the inmates in federal state, and local prison, but black men are only 4 percent of all students in American institutions of higher education† (Maxwell). It has to be said, however, that circumstance is everything, and whilst Marcus is part of a 4% statistic, he is also one of   â€Å"17% of blacks age 25 and older who had a bachelor’s degree or more in 2005† (US Census, 2007). Marcus has been in the fraternity since his Freshman year and is seen as a figurehead of the house. Simon Li American-Asian, Freshman, music student from Louisiana. It isn’t unusual for there to be a diverse ethnicity in fraternities, but it is also been cited as something as irregular. According to some fraternity members, this comes down to simply just a matter of comfort. â€Å"Minorities don’t rush because they are intimidated by the stereotypically white Greek system,† Ngan said. On the other hand, â€Å"a lot of minorities do rush, they are just more comfortable hanging out with people of the same ethnic background.†(Brubaker, 2000). Simon Li is a ‘Rushee’ and a freshman music student from Louisiana. He is a second generation American-Asian, with roots in China. According to the census bureau, Louisiana has a registered American-Asian population of 1.4% (2005) with 2.5% of firms owned by Asians in the state. Simon Li’s parents own and operate a chain of successful auto-part stores – and nothing related to restaurants or grocery stores, as is often the stereotype. Having grown-up in Louisiana, Simon has a soft spot for anything Cajun, as well as an interest in music – from country to bluegrass. His predominant interests do not lie with traditions, but with incorporating grassroot sounds with techno, or club music. Dermot â€Å"Ozzie† Sullivan Australian, Sophomore, medical student. International students continue to make-up a large percentage of undergraduates at American universities. According to Hahn-Koenig, within Philadelphia, â€Å"more than 11,000 are enrolled in the city alone, with thousands more studying elsewhere in Pennsylvania† (2007). Whilst the Australian university system is considerably good, Dermot has come to America to broaden his horizons. His family is part of the wealthy upper-class in Australia, which avails him the high tuition fees and ability to apply for a student visa. Despite Australia being a part of the Visa Waiver Program, Dermot would have had to apply for a F-1 visa in order to study in America (State Dept, 2007). Dermot is an easy-going guy who is hard-working but also knows how to enjoy life. He appears to be a well-liked sort on-campus. Victor Henson Sophomore, member of a neo-nazi group. The antagonist of the characters. Victor is a Caucasian American from a poor background in middle America. He has not known his father, and his mother continues to struggle to make ends meet and keeping a family. His family are like many who should have seen better times after Clinton’s welfare reforms, but still suffer from poverty conditions. The Anti-Defamation League have cited a 12% decline in anti-Semitic activities, in recent surveys, however â€Å"it is disturbing that there are still an average of about four anti-Semitic attacks per day in America† (ADL, 2007). Victor indulges in many on-campus parties, and unsurprising is his overindulgence in alcohol. He is the student who is trying to fit in, and is a â€Å"Rushee† of the fraternity. SCRIPT Scene: Outside the campus library. It is a noticeably Fall day, and overcast. Marcus (leaving the library): Hey, Ozzie! How’s it going? Ozzie (seated on the stairs of the library): Gudday, Marcus. Yeah, s’alright, I reckon. Weather’s a bit foul, eh? Marcus (looks up briefly, smiles): Definitely going to rain. Hey, you seen that new rushee? Uh, Victor I think his name is. Ozzie: Yeah, yeah, I have. Saw him last night. Was hammered something nasty, I tell ya. Looked real green in the bushes (laughs) Marcus: Drunk? Ozzie: Aw, totally smashed, mate. Marcus: Hm, well Freshman, I suppose. But, listen, you think you can have a talk with him? See what he wants from joining a fraternity, and if he’d fit in. (slaps Ozzie on the arm with a book) Be a spy, eh? Ozzie: Yeah, yeah. Sure. Check ya later, eh? Marcus and Ozzie part ways. Scene change: Ozzie is in the frat house with Simon, who is ‘plugged in’ to a laptop and appears to be listening to music. Ozzie throws a screwed up paper ball at him. Simon (loudly): What? Ozzie demonstrates to remove the earphones, and Simon does. Simon (normal volume): What? Ozzie: Ya seen that new kid? Victor? Simon: Yeah, he was looking a little rough in the kitchen. Told him to clean the dishes for us. Ozzie: Smooth move, mate, smooth move. Hey, what ya think of him? Simon: Meh, he’s okay, I guess. He doesn’t say much to me. Ozzie: Hm, fair enough. I’ll go talk to him. Marcus wants the scoop on him, see if he’ll fit. Simon nods and plugs back into his laptop. Ozzie goes to the kitchen where Victor is struggling in removing a pair of rubber gloves from his hands. Ozzie: Hey mate, lemme give ya a hand. Hah – get it. Victor: Yeah, I got it. Ozzie: Jeez, no humor, eh? Victor: Sorry, still hungover a bit.. and†¦ (voice trails off) Ozzie: What’s up? Feelin’ a bit crock still? Victor: Huh? Ozzie: Ill. The hangover†¦ Victor: Nah, not the hangover. Just†¦ hey, I can talk to you right, yeah? Ozzie: Sure, mate. We’re all brothers. Or, well.. you â€Å"might† be, eh? (smiles) Victor: Yeah, I guess.. well.. I don’t know. Seems really†¦ well†¦ Ozzie: What? Victor: Well, why are they in charge here? Ozzie: Who ya mean? The seniors? Victor: Nah.. well yeah.. but†¦ nevermind. Ozzie: Something bothering you, you know you can tell me. Or Marcus even, mate. Victor (sneers): I don’t think so. Ozzie: What? Marcus? Nah, he’s cool, mate. Don’t need to worry about him. He’s a good egg. Victor: Egg? Rotten, more like. His sort are nothing but trouble. Ozzie: His sort? What Greenpeace Al Gore types? (laughs) Victor: No†¦ his â€Å"sort†. Ozzie: Don’t get you mate†¦ you mean New Yorkers? Victor (laughs): Yeah†¦ New Yorkers. Whatever. Victor leaves, sees Simon still plugged in and shakes his head. Ozzie looks perplexed and follows Victor out of the house. Ozzie: Wait up. So, I don’t get what you meant in there. Victor: You want me say, for real? Ozzie: Yeah, mate. For real. Victor: I don’t trust Marcus. His type are nothing but trouble, they take advantage of everything. Ozzie: Wait, wait.. his type? What’s his type? Victor: Black, man. I got to spell it out, or what? You fucking blind? Blacks are nothing but trouble. Ozzie: Woah.. woah†¦ you can’t be serious†¦ Victor: Yeah†¦ well maybe I am. He’s always getting up in my business. Ozzie: Well you are trying to join the fraternity†¦ Victor: Yeah, well screw it. I don’t want to be a black man’s brother, ya know. Ozzie: Jesus†¦ well.. yeah, I don’t think I want you around either†¦ Marcus walks up to them outside the house. Victor falls silent but stares at Marcus. Ozzie is stunned, but looks serious. Marcus notices the uneasiness quickly. Marcus: Everything alright? Victor (snorts): Yeah, man. Victor walks away, and Marcus looks at Ozzie questioningly. Marcus: Ozzie? What happened? Ozzie: I dunno mate†¦ I really dunno†¦. References _. Lousiana State Quick Facts. Census Bureau. (available from: http://quickfacts.census.gov/qfd/states/22000.html ) _. New York City, Black History Month, 2007. Census Bureau Press Release, February, 2007. (available from: http://www.census.gov/Press-Release/www/releases/archives/facts_for_features_special_editions/007862.html ) _. Anti-Semitic Incidents in US. Press Release. Anti-Defamation League, 2007. (available: http://www.adl.org/PresRele/ASUS_12/4993-12.htm ) _ . Student Visas. US State Department, Bureau of Consular Affairs. (Available from: http://travel.state.gov/visa/temp/types/types_1268.html ) Brubaker, C. â€Å"Greek system concerned with diversity† The Cavalier Daily, April 5, 2000. (available: http://www.cavalierdaily.com/CVArticle.asp?ID=3898pid=564 ) Hahn-Koenig, A. â€Å"Coming to America.† OneBigCampus.com 2007 (available: http://www.onebigcampus.com/article_comingtoamerica.htm ) Maxwell, B. â€Å"On campus, grim statistics for African-American men.† St. Petersburg Times, January 4, 2004. (available from: How to cite Character breakdown, Essay examples

Professional Communication Skills for Blue Seed- myassignmenthelp

Question: Discuss about theProfessional Communication Skills for Blue Seed Consultant. Answer: Introduction Candy Mechanic retails personalised chocolate in London. Their mission is to provide high-quality chocolate. Candy Mechanic CIO, Jennifer Lawrence approach to Blue Seed Consultant Company to solve the issue that the development team of the system is facing a problem with the communication of Candy Mechanic. However, to secure this work, the company had sent a request for Zoom conference meeting with Jennifer Lawrence. Jennifer would not be able to meet on time given by Blue Seed Consultant and mail them about it. Therefore, Jennifer fixed the meeting on 8th Friday with Harry. Jennifer mentions that Harry repairs 13 GB versioning log that will be sent through a USB with other stuff. It would not be possible for Jennifer to send details of all the stuff through an email. Jennifer asked Blue Seed Consultant to bring TFN declaration, corporate credit card of the company or the statement of the bank. The CIO also wanted to know whether an employee of Blue Seed Consultant has an idea about converting the doc to pdf format. From this study, it will identify the problems in the email that Jennifer has provided. Finally, the study will give an inductive argument and a deductive argument about the communication strategy made by the Blue Seed Consultant Candy Mechanics chocolate provider. Identified Problem in the email The problem that has identified in the email are: The conversation that Jennifer wanted to propose An informal way of addressing The sentence construction is not appropriate and Incomplete grammar Effective Communication Strategies Blue Seed Consultant need to implement effective strategies of communication to exchange information between sender and receiver. Here comes the point where communication strategies give a blueprint of the information that will be exchanged (Gholamzadeh Ravana, 2016). The strategy that Blue Seed Consultant would apply to respond to the email will include the concept of the transactional process model of communication (Lucas, 2017). In this model, the sender and receiver known as the communicators, exchange message and reverse each time they send and receive messages. The medium used by Candy mechanic is Email messaging and Jennifer and Blue Seed Consultant the communicator. The communication between Blue Seed Consultant and Jennifer should be alive as both are interdependent to each other. If either of the communicators is not listening then transactional communication is not possible. The medium used for the communication of message would be efficient and reliable. This type of communication not only exchange message but also create and establish a community to help people with the interconnected relationship. Conclusion From this study, it has concluded that the source, receiver, environment and medium that are used by the Candy Mechanic Company was not appropriate due to which the system development team were not able to properly communicate with other. When they approach Blue Seed Consultant that could get a solution to their issue. Therefore, the Blue Seed Consultant advice some strategy for communication. Thorough the Transactional Model, the system development team of Candy Mechanic are now able to communicate very easily. Topic: Access to the digital infrastructure for the regional business The thesis will argue about the access to the digital infrastructure for the regional business. There has been an improvement in the services of telecommunication for the metropolitan areas with the technological and commercial development. There is evidence which signifies the digital divide between regional and metropolitan Australia. The Swinburne Universitys Australian Digital Inclusion Index has provided evidence with the disadvantage of ability to, access to and affordable of the use of the services that are digital in regional Australia. When analysing the economic activities of all the industries, digital technologies has embedded, and constrained growth has been found in regional Australia in the absence of telecommunication capabilities and infrastructure. It was noted that rural populations spread across a huge area. As compare to metropolitan markets, the market of regional telecommunication provides weaker commercial incentives for the private investment. Through this, i t can explain that the outcome of the services and the digital infrastructure of the regional area are dependent on the policy of the government as compared to the metropolitan areas. If the potential of the digital infrastructure has underdeveloped, then it will reduce the competitiveness of using new technologies. Rather, it will take the opportunities to associate the advantage of economic growth. Topic: Rapid changes in the digital environment When analysing the data from LinkedIn in the year 2016, It has found that there were demands of ICT workers with technical skill like web programming, IT infrastructure and cloud computing and some business skills like Strategic planning, customer service, and project management. Another analysis done in 2015 has a breakdown the trades of the industry where the report of Australias Digital Pulse examined that Australias imports and exports of goods have ICT intensity. For the women IT jobs, it has suggested that there is a need for an improvement in the female representation that requires changes in the ICT workforce. It has highlighted the evidence that almost half of the ICT workforce of Australia are working outside that are directly related to ICT industries. Through this, it can be understood that overseas workers are employed based on the current ICT requirements. The report of ALRC has flagged data mining, cloud computing and text mining for the growth of the digital area. Wit h all this analysis it has concluded that there have been rapid changes in the digital environment which have been responded to the benefits of the society. References Gholamzadeh, D., Ravana, E. (2016). Transactional model: A comprehensive framework for leadership process understanding. International Journal of Humanities and Cultural Studies (IJHCS)? ISSN 2356-5926, 1(1), 1168-1208. Lucas, P. R. (2017). Positioning critical reflection within cooperative education: A transactional model. Asia-Pacific Journal of Cooperative Education, (3), 257-268.